What do you feel when you see a spit bucket? Dread? Yes, me too. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, they’re usually found at large wine tastings where several producers are pouring their wines. Some call it a spittoon. If you swallowed every wine you tried, you’d be drunk in no time and experience palate fatigue (where you’re no longer be able to taste the wine). The bucket serves as a place to both spit out the wine and to dump out extra wine in your glass.
They serve a good purpose but the whole idea is uncomfortable for most of us, especially women. We don’t grow up learning to spit like men do. It feels rude, disgusting or embarrassing as you imagine the awkward, dribble-down-your-chin moments.
I don’t normally feel I am at a loss by not knowing how to spit, but this scenario is the exception. I decided to do some research and came across the following.
- Practice at home.
- Don’t worry too much what you look like.
- Don’t sip too much wine. A quarter ounce to a half ounce is plenty.
- Use force, but not too much or too little. Find a happy medium.
- Use your tongue to guide the muscles in your mouth and cheeks to force the wine out.
- At the end, give a little extra force so the last couple of drops don’t end up on your chin.
- Close your mouth to create a very small hole, which will give you more control and help you direct it better. (This came from my husband.)
- As Jancis Robinson says in her book How to Taste, “‘Spit with pride’ might as well be the wine taster’s motto.”
- Carry a cup
With this arsenal of advice, I set out to test these theories at home with two red Solo cups and water. I figured if I could make it happen with the small circumference of a Solo cup, I’d certainly be able to handle the larger spit bucket!
Here are my conclusions.
False: Don’t worry too much what you look like.
Um…sorry, easier said than done. There’s a pretty good chance I and many others do worry what we look like or we wouldn’t be here. Even at home I was laughing at myself!
Truth: Sip only 1/4 ounce to a 1/2 ounce of wine.
A half was even too much for me. A quarter was the sweet spot. I found this to be one of the biggest factors in the success of said spit. If I had more, it ended up splashing back in my face, which is unpleasant to begin with not to mention the thought of a bucket full of other peoples’ spit. Some of it also ended up on my chin. Take small sips!
Truth: Use your tongue and muscles in your mouth and cheeks to force the wine out.
So helpful! I played around with this. It made sense in my head but putting into action was anther story. What worked best was pulling my cheeks in a bit like I was preparing to do a fish face (Not a full fish face. Then you’ll really look like a goof!).
Truth: Close your mouth to create a very small hole, which will give you more control and help you direct it better.
My fish face automatically pursed my lips to form a small opening and my tongue moved towards the roof of my mouth, causing a very small space that helped guide the water. The tip of my tongue was right behind my lips, so that by the time the water reached the opening, it was in a steady stream I could control. Thanks sweetie!
Truth: Use force, but not too much or too little. Find a happy medium.
This takes some practice! When I used a lot of force, it ended up splashing in my face again. One time it went clear over the other side of the cup, onto the floor and all over my pants! Ha! When a tried a slower speed, it ended up on my chin. Finding a happy medium is key, as is adding a little extra force at the end so the last drops don’t end up on your chin. Also, keep the right frame of mind. When I was anxious and in a rush (like I’ve been before at tastings), I tended to use too much force. If I was focused and relaxed, I felt confident and it usually was a success. Jancis was right. Spit with pride!
Additional Truth: Mind the distance.
This was one I realized on my own. Don’t stand too far from the bucket. I tried different distances and when my face wasn’t just over the cup (not in the cup, over it), it landed on the side, on the table, just anywhere but the cup. Over time as you practice more, you might do fine with more distance but for now, stay close!
Biggest Truth: Practice at home.
I felt so much more confident even after just one practice session. By practicing, you’ll get a feel for how you spit (never thought I’d say that), your technique and what works best for you.
One last thing.
Some tastings will have red Solo cups for you to carry around, which is the ultimate because you have your own private spittoon. Rather than bending over a bucket, you can easily bring the cup to your mouth. If any splash back happens, at least it’s your own spit! That said, you should still know how to spit properly because private receptacle or not, you’ll end up with it all over your chin if you don’t understand the technique.
Good luck! Have fun! Laugh at yourself!
